Only Stories

Melding to my suckling baby boy during a sweltering San Diego Autumn heat wave with temperatures reaching close to ninety degrees, we rocked and gazed into each other's eyes. While the fans whirred peacefully in the uncommonly quiet solitude of our home recording studio, amber light filtered in through the white cotton curtains dancing and swaying like ghosts in the circulating air. 
Our home, normally strewn with cables, mic stands, musicians, instruments and a tireless record producer (who doubled as "Daddy",) pacing in and out of the rooms in an endless ere of setting up sound, working with musicians, refilling his coffee and checking in on his baby mama and son, was now empty. The calm after the storm. Leaving me with an early evening with nothing to do but create new melodies for the lullabies I hoped my son would sing to his babies someday. 

On this particular occasion, my little one played a big part in honing in the perfect melody and I discovered how opinionated (Daddy's) little boy could really be. Along with the gentle hum of the fans and my baby's cooing from time to time, I was hearing a subtle Native American drum beat deep inside my head. I like to think that it was the combination of our hearts beating as one. With it came bits and pieces of a melody that I began to hum out loud. Every few notes, my son would readily coo or grunt depending on whether or not he liked what was developing...in which case, after an hour of humming to avoid his grunts, I somehow became his instrument. While the melody for Only Stories was born, he finally closed his eyes and I laid my son down to sleep with the profound knowledge that he and I were writing our lullaby together. My heart swelled with a tenderness and pride only I can fully comprehend.  
Over the course of the next few weeks, maybe even months, I carried our melody along with a deep desire to create the perfect lyrics for our lullaby. I spent hours writing and re-writing my innermost thoughts scrawled on notebooks, napkins and sometimes even the palm of my hand and used the same method we used to achieve the final melody, testing each line while singing my baby to sleep. 
While most lullabies are laced with Fairy Tales and stories, I reveled in the thought that I could potentially enrich my child's life by telling him the truth, or at least what I've come to believe in the years that I've lived...that everything we're told, everything we tell, whether to ourselves or to others, is essentially a story and what we choose to believe resides deep down inside, sometimes hiding until revealed by the words of a story or Fairy Tale with just the right key to unlock our own inner mysteries. Because each one of us holds in our heart our own truths and that is what guides us on our journeys through life.
Only Stories is about the stories we're told since the day we're born that become the lessons we share until the day we die.
Here, I share with you one of my favorite works of art. One that I will hold close and dear to my heart as the song my baby and I wrote one note, one heartbeat and one belief of truth at a time.

Only Stories
Brooke Mackintosh

I just had a brilliant idea
Let's call it poetry
Wrap it up in black and white
With satin bows
Never mind
The words you've heard before
It's only history
All you need to know
It's really nothing more

They're just stories that we tell
When there's really no one else's
Point to view
Only stories that we chase
When there's nothing
That'll face us with the truth
You'll find what's true
Inside of only you

Let me live each moment as it comes
You love a mystery
I am not your story
I cannot be told
Pay no mind unless you cross that line
A future oh, so fine
Someone wrote it
And they sold it into gold

They're just stories that we tell
When there's really no one else's
Point to view
Only stories that we chase
When there's nothing
That'll face us with the truth
You'll find what's true
Inside of only you
Beware what's there
Disguised as living proof
They're just stories

Build a bridge into a new horizon
Focus on the love each step will take
Deny no neighbor thoughts or dreams of illusion
Befriend,  shake hands, collaborate
They're just stories

They're just stories that we tell
When there's really no one else's
Point to view
Only stories that we chase
When there's nothing that'll face us with the truth




Thank you for reading my blog, for taking the time to listen to my music and for entering a sacred part of my world. Here, in my heart, you are welcome.

You may hear this song at my website www.BrookeMackintoshMusic.com
Written in 2012. Recorded by Sven-Erik Seaholm at Kitsch & Sync Production in San Diego, CA, April 2013.

Journey

Journey

Once upon a time, in a land far away, (the beautifully mountain encased Utah,) there lived a young woman with hopes as high as the sky and dreams as deep as the deep blue sea. She had recently left her home and everything she once believed behind to commence a soulful journey to sunny San Diego, CA.
Her childhood fantasies of living a life as a musician called to her upon a great awakening of her spirit and mind and she packed her clothes, guitars, Labrador and Tabby into her mini SUV and headed down the 15 towards hope for a brighter tomorrow.
As soon as she arrived, she quickly established herself amongst other singer/songwriters who helped inspire and expand her writing capabilities by example and by participating in songwriting games and showcases.
Sometime in that first year, she'll not soon forget spending her last $10 on a CD called "Daydreaming At Night" by songwriter extraordinaire and a local celebrity, named Gregory Page.
After delving into the intricate folds of lyrical sensibility, elaborate French persuasion and "old-timey" folk that made up a world of familiar, yet new sounds to her enjoyment, she sat down at her piano and wrote "Journey."
Longing for a simpler time and originally written as a duet, the lyrics of which are about the same young woman who felt rather stuck in the place she once thought she most longed to be and for the life of her, could not seem to figure out where to go or what to do next.

Journey

Start a new page
Everyday's a clean slate
I'm a hopeless romantic
In a day and an age
Where love's
But a fleeting moment
Passing by
Where do I
Fit in here?

Blue skies await
Inside I stay
Protect my fragile skin
Made of cellophane
Where the light
Might be too bright
For me to hide
Where do I
How do I
Go from here?

Journey take me far away
Far away to another place
Where my heart won't depreciate
Over time
Journey take me far away
Far away to another place
Where do I
How do I
Go from here?
Go from here

Crashing waves break
Reach and pull away
I'm standing on a cliff
It's time to take a leap of faith
Should I swim
Or am I strong
Enough to fly
Where do I
How do I
Go from here?

Journey take me far away
Far away to another place
Where my heart won't depreciate
Over time
Journey take me far away
Far away to another place
Where do I
How do I
Go from here?
Go from here

Thank you for reading my blog.

Your interest and support continues to serve as a beacon for my soul to continue onward on this beautiful road I've chosen.

Music brought us together. Long live the muse!

Love,

Brooke


Www.BrookeMackintoshMusic.com

Inside A Breeze (2013)

One of my most recent songs to date, Inside a Breeze, takes the listener on a personal journey into the winds of change. This song has yet to be released on an album, but I look forward to sharing it with you musically soon.

I began writing this song embraced by a warm San Diego breeze just after reacquiring a beautiful, original instrument I like to call the "Stratavuke."

The "Vuke", (as it's called by it's maker,) is a violin with classical guitar strings and a long neck, similar to a banjo or ukulele, (hence the name.) She was created by a musician, creative artist and a good friend of mine, Owen Burke (www.OwenBurkeArt.com,) who crafted the design upon awakening from a dream, in which he spoke with Antonio Strativari (an 18th Century Italian well known for his craftsmanship of stringed instruments such as the violin, cello, and harp.) Once created, the Vuke would be tested and tried by only a select few musicians, only to return to gather dust in Owen's workshop, until one day, she and I would meet. Seemingly lost amidst many other stringed instruments, I noticed her and asked to see how she played. After witnessing my instant desire to possess her, but without the means to do so rightfully, Owen offered her to me as a gift to share with the world, knowing she would be handled with care and more importantly, played with love. Thanks to Owen, by some Universal grace and a gentle stir of the winds, I am blessed to make music with the help of such an amazing instrument.

Having been through my own emotional hurricanes, tornadoes and even the gentle whispering breeze, like a leaf, a drop of water, or even a bird, I have been carried away on spectacular journeys. Though, I have not always been ready to set sail, I have found many of life's greatest discoveries and treasures, inside those strange, yet powerful winds of change.

Inside A Breeze

Maybe if you'd shown me
Who you really were
We'd have different stories to tell
Always had this feeling
That you understood
Still, I feel you know me rather well

Nearly made it out to sea
Left the stream behind
Troubled winds came calling
Who knew what I'd find
Inside a breeze

Strange the ways you help me
This frightened little girl
Ashamed, I've been so sheltered from the world
Someday you might tell me
What I long to know
Why is it so hard to say the words?

Nearly made it out to sea
Left the stream behind
Troubled winds came calling
Who knew what I'd find
Let the sails unwind
Inside a breeze

In my heart I know
True love may be disguised
And troubled winds might sweep your dreams
Away before your eyes  
Oh, Mother knows no boundaries
So Father makes the time
Any seed that falls on fertile soil
Can survive

Nearly made it out to sea
Left the stream behind
Troubled winds came calling
Let the sails unwind
Heaven knows what treasures you will find
Inside a breeze

Nearly made it out to sea...


Thank you kindly for reading my blog. I hope to see you at one of my live performances soon.
Because of your love and support, I continue to do what I love to do.

With all my heart,

Brooke


P.S. Word of mouth is still the fastest way to spread the music. Spread the love.
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Scared Of Love

A short introduction.

Scared Of Love is about having hopes of communicating love in some way to someone and realizing that hope was one sided. Written awaiting someone who never showed.

 

Scared Of Love

You are here
Now I see
How much you mean to me
I have lived
I have loved
Now I want to give you
Some of my love
You walked right into my life
You don't give a damn
If I need you
You walked right into my soul
You don't care if I
If I left you now, and I'll go
If I leave right now, and I'll go
Would you know?
Have you ever been lonesome?
Even your own Sun
Is coming down
And it feels like tomorrow
Is coming in sorrow
Don't let me down
Don't you walk away from me
I told you where I'm gonna be
Don't you care what I feel
I told you my love is for real
Let me inside your heart
Let me know why we fell apart
Just one look and I'll see
Why you won't let yourself
Fall in love with me
I don't give a damn if you
Don't want to
Cause I know you're scared of love
Yes, I know you're scared of loving me

Written in 1997
Available on iTunes and CDBaby on my debut album, "Brooklyn - Blue Skies Await"
Copyright 2007


Thank you for reading my blog.

Please check out my music at www.reverbnation.com/brookemackintosh
Friend me and "like: my Music page on Facebook - www.facebook.com/brookemackintoshmusic
Follow me on Twitter, www.twitter.com/BrookeMacketc
Listen for fresh sounds on www.Soundcloud.com/BrookeMackintosh

And please come to a show and introduce yourself. :)
I look forward to meeting you soon.

-Brooke

Someday I'll Know

Someday I'll Know

"Someday I'll Know" was originally a creative writing assignment given by my Honors English teacher, during my Senior year in High School. We were given the option of writing poetry, a short story, a song or sonnet, as it were. With sound reason and a broken heart as my muse, my pencil hit the paper immediately, infusing feelings of young love, hope and desire into what would be known, if only to me, as my second song.

At that point in my life, I was deeply enthralled in my first true heartbreak. It was the kind of romance movies were made of, but unlike most romantic movies, this story was not destined to have a perfect ending.

"Someday I'll Know" was written in between hopeful letters between long distance lovers.

This song has come to hold different meanings, for different moments in my life. One of the reasons I still play this song, is not only because my teacher encouraged me by giving me an A on my assignment, but because it continues to resonate in my heart. Someday I'll know, but for now, I'll continue to hope.

Someday I'll Know
by Brooke Mackintosh, 1996

One of these days, I'd like to know what you're thinkin'
One of these days, I'd like to know who you are
I wanna see your face shine every morning
I wanna know you'll be mine out in the stars

Someday I'll know
One day in time
Someday I'll know
When you are mine
And we've been together
Always forever
Someday I'll know
Someday I'll know

One of these days I'd like to give you my lovin'
And I think you wouldn't mind so much
I just want you to hold me close to your body
I just want you to know that I can be love

Someday I'll know
One day in time
Someday I'll know
When you are mine
And we've been together
Always forever
Someday I'll know
Someday I'll know

Every once in a while I'd like to be near you
Holidin' you close in my dreams just ain't enough

Someday I'll know
One day in time
Someday I'll know
When you are mine
And we've been together
Always forever
Someday I'll know
Someday I'll know
Someday I'll know
Someday
I'll know

Written in 1996 by Brooke Mackintosh, Copyrights Reserved
"Someday I'll Know" has yet to be recorded.
Thank you for reading my blog.

Yours Truly,

Brooke


To hear my music, please visit me at:
www.reverbnation.com/brookemackintosh

Soundcloud.com/BrookeMackintoshMusic

If You Try

If You Try was my first completed song and it was the first of many I would write on the guitar.

 

Well, truthfully I had been making up songs on the piano for years, and maybe even making up words as I sang along, but it never happened like this before. I hadn't fully identified with the poet in my heart, until I was a Sophomore in high school and of course, romance, was the key that would open that heart shaped box.

It was a time of mixed emotions, moderate confusion and maybe a little of what my Grandma Jean used to call "boy crazy," and boy, was she right. I was crazy about boys. Ever since I was little, I loved boys, all of them, and we seemed to get a long just fine. Of course no one seemed to mind when I was a little tom-boy, running around the neighborhood, playing football, jumping bikes off fantastically devastating and wobbly ramps, to which I suffered many great falls and injuries, but nothing so insignificant ever stopped me! I was a tough little girl who prided herself on being a tom-boy, and being able to do anything any boy could do...and sometimes, I could do it better.

Of course, nature has a way of changing everything, just when you think you've got things pretty much figured out. Soon enough, I was called in to the house when the boys came around, instead of being able to play football, I was asked to do dishes and other such "women's work," as my Grandpa Elden used to say. All in all, the sudden shift in what I once could do, but now couldn't do, may have caused a bit of resentment, restlessness and inner rebellion, (but we'll get into that a bit later.) 

Later, rather than sooner, I started to recognize the positive aspects change can bring. I think being an early bloomer caused me to hide my sudden ladylike figure longer than some of the other girls my age. I wore baggy jeans and t-shirts up until my Freshman year in high school. Eventually I caught on though, with the help of my mom, who helped me learn to walk like a lady and, with a bit of a struggle, dress like one too.

Which inadvertently, brings me back to my heart shaped box.   

Now considered a young woman, wearing make-up and clothes I wouldn't be caught dead in today, I was surprised to find I'd somehow acquired the attention of a young man, who also recently changed over from the "baggy" look, to a more distinguished, cowboy look. His name was Josh and he slipped a note into my hand between classes and just as quickly, won me over with a poem he wrote, in red ink, just for me.

Of course, I instantly became his hand-holding girlfriend and wrote him a love poem in return. 

I still remember the first few lines...

"When I first met you

There was something in your eyes

It made me want to touch you

It made me realize

That you were all alone

And I was by myself

Perhaps it was time

To love somebody else..."

Well...it was something like that.

Between women's work and talking on the phone with my boyfriend, (who I was forbidden to see, outside of school, and only allowed to talk to when my dad wasn't home,) I would lock myself in my room, writing pages and pages of nonsensical and romantic poetry. When my mom realized the artistic frenzy I was in, she searched through her old keepsakes and dug up a box of poetry she had obviously kept since the 70's. Each page was filled with beautiful, diabolical and strange poems, each printed in unique fonts, written sideways, upside down, in circles, waves, backwards and mirrored on brilliantly colored, flowery, (definitely 70's) hippy style paper. I wish I knew what had become of that box full of poetry, but I digress. It wasn't so much the poems that inspired me, but the fact that I was "into" something my mom was obviously once "into," as well and that made me happy.     

Feeling artistically inclined, enhanced my ever strengthening desire to strum my dad's prized possession, his '76 acoustic Fender guitar. It was a gift from my mom, back when they were dating and it leaned against the wall everyday of my life and called to me. I was forbidden to touch it, unless I was dusting, and then I would "accidentally" pluck or brush the dust off the strings. I'll never forget the day my dad bounded into the room during one of these precious moments and instead of giving me slack, asked if I'd like to learn how to play it.

Whoa, was that a pivotal turning point in my life. It didn't matter that I had to cut off my beautiful nails, or the fact that my hands weren't quite strong enough to hold a G chord at first...my dad stuck with me and taught me a song with a real pretty picking pattern and a handful of chords, and that was more than enough to get me started.    

With those few chords, that same picking pattern and a song in my heart, I wrote "If You Try." 

All these years later, looking back, sometimes that's when you realize where a song truly came from and what it's really about.

This song was written for my parents who were doing their best to not only protect me from the ways of the world, but also show me their love, even if I made it hard at times.

Well, Mom and Dad, I hope you know every song I write, comes from the same place and begins and ends with your love, dedication, patience, blood, sweat and tears. I am the songwriter I am today, because of both of you and because it takes me back to that place of patience, trust and knowing everything is going to be OK. Thank you. I love you.

IF YOU TRY

By Brooke Mackintosh

(Available on iTunes under Brooklyn ~ Blue Skies Await)

Hey, can't you see

What you mean to me?

Hey, don't you know

You can be what you want to be

If you try

Don't you worry now

I know I love you

I won't worry now

I know you'll love me true

If you try

To be here

By my side

I won't cry

Please don't go

I don't know what I'd do

Without you

How will you know

What I'm feeling

About you?

If you try

To be here

By my side

I won't cry

The day will be so long

Without you I don't belong

If you try

To be here

By my side

I won't cry

I won't cry

If you try

Thank you for reading my blog.

I will be writing more about the songs I've written and hope you'll enjoy the journey, as I have.

Your friend, 

Brooke Mackintosh\

www,reverbnation.com/brookemackintosh